AZ's Diary of a Damned Man

The past week has really fucked me up. Shall I blame Svetty? I mean, when I think of last year at this same time, my friend and annual partner in the smartass Olympics Michael Illinsky threw a hand into hurricane relief in Florida. Now a year later, as we are surrounded by beautiful woman and the possibility of spontaneous sex, there was a hurricane brewing. This time in NOLA my second favorite place in the good ol USA.

Actually the whole thing is truly breaking my heart. The aftermath of the initial blast of Katrina and the levee break and subsequent looting, raping and all around violence does not reaffirm my faith in the human condition whatsoever. The actions of the so called victims is as hypocritical as out current administration.

Now, I'm speaking of the people who are stealing guns and shooting at the helicopters flying in to help the stranded. And the bunghole scum of the earth hijacking trucks full of medial supplies who are attempting to deliver sterile supplies to those who need, require and deserve aid. The innocent thousands whose demographic akin to those scofflaws who'd disobey authority in any event are suffering true loss and devastation and the death a disuse and after affect of this tragedy will develop as time unravel. I am truly disgusted and upset. And as I called my good friend Mark Williams who I have called Too Dark Mark since 1998 a man who is a world renowned record engineer and producer married to Cara a lovely Georgia Peach and father of nearly two too tall boys, living in Baton Rouge, I knew not what to expect. He was okay, he had phone service and water but his father in Mississippi was not as well off. Mark who had just flown in from a gig in Germany came home to immediately try to get supplies to his dad. He told me of the looting, and hijacking and pillaging of the locals. I grew sicker. My friend Anastasia a NOLA area doctor, I'm sure made it back to Kenosha. Heather Booth god only knows, where she may be. I hope safe in Indpls. for she was for a few years the sole person who never forgot me on holidays. Wherever you are my dear, I will never forget your kindness, and the other. Sean Yseult former White Zombie bassist and current member of Rock City Morgue certainly must have made it out. Her bar, The Saint, in the Garden District where Trent lived before relocating to LA is more than likely a virtual junkyard.

New Orleans, see my bio, it's my #2 favorite place on earth. As I will remember it as many other will and those who called her home will never see her the same again. No matter what is done, no much how much time has passed, no matter how much or how many millions of dollars will be spent on restoration and rebuilding her ultimate charm and history will she ever be the same. And that is a shame. And to everyone in the service industry who relied on the dollars generated by tourism, I feel for you. And I only hope that in you dire hour of need you will get the relief and aid you so richly deserve and have earned. I always will appreciate your sheer southern charm, hospitality and manners. I like you will return.

And speaking of southern charm, my story here and my ultimate update revolves around the wonderful Corina Taylor, porn star, MK UltraViXXXen, and ultimately my friend.

Are We Not Men? We Are DEVO!

But as always the story begins with something nearly as dramatic at least as far as personal dilemma and frustration goes, pure Zanderesque D-R-A-M-A! And it all has to do with a massively influential band known as DEVO.

It was Thursday morning Oct 25 and my brother arrived at his airport only to discover that his flight was not until the next day. So the next day we begin communications and his flight to Chicago is delayed. A one our flight, no big deal, right? No wrong. As hours go by his flight is eventually cancelled due to a door coming off of the plane. Somehow late in the afternoon he finagles a connecting flight to Detroit and here to Chicago. He should be arriving at exactly the same time as I do from work. And as luck would have it, this day on the eve of a very hectic scheduled weekend, I get detoured to make a run from Clark and Belmont, 2 stops from home to take a bus west and pick up more supplies for the weekend. And as I do it is not known to me that my brothers flight is overhead circling O'Hare for TWO HOURS waiting to land. And by the time I got back to my stop, where I was when I became detoured he calls me and lets me know he finally landed and asks that I have a drink waiting for him at le casa.

I get home, change, make a round of Captain Morgan Tattoo and cokes. We catch up, get ready and grab a cab to the House Of Blues. Two blocks from our destination he realizes he had left his ticket back at the pad, so we have to have the cabbie drive us back as we find his ticket and go back to the HOB,where teh cab fare with tip was over an excess of $50. But it was DEVO afterall, a band I go my little brother into when he was a mere 5 years old and before the bands popularity had exploded with "Whip It' , actually years before. I had discovered DEVO on a show called, Don Kirshner's Rock Concert a good 4 years before MTV. I loved DEVO and in turn so did my little brother. And for us to see this band together 25 years later was for us a long overdue milestone. So here we were my brother, Kelly and I in the posh Foundation Room, and a box to see the show and DEVO who have never had an opening act in all the years I've seen them which is as far back as 1982 and the show is about to begin.

Kelly and I take our places in the box and my brother had insisted on taking to the floor. And from the moment the show began it was a non stop over the top amazing performance. To our joy and surprise they played a lot from our shared favorite DEVO offering, "Duty Now For The Future". These were obscure tunes little known to the masses who went nutty and practiced their high-fives during "Whip It". When Mark Motherbaugh began ripping the yellow radiation suits into shreds and tossing the pieces out to the crowd, I knew my lil bro would get a piece of it. I just knew it. Then it happened, a huge shred of Marks uniform was shot towards my bother, and another guy grabbed it and that guy went down, and after my brother had him on the floor a minute, the poor SOB knew to give in. I was so happy for my brother I could have shed a tear but he looked up at me for approval and I gave him what he deserved, the big proud brother ultimate approval. The entire show was amazing, and being these guys, all with Masters Degrees from Kent State, each in their mid to late fifties gave us a show unlike those current road warriors and top 40 acts ever could. It was well worth the 80 plus bucks per ticket a $200 bar tab and a $50 cab ride.

Kelly who also joined me to see The Doors a few weeks ago had now witnessed another of those great bands that have helped mold me into the man that I am. Be that good or bad, it doesn't matter. She is a great companion and the weekend was just beginning.

We got back to Kelly's before midnight and my brother and I stayed up like we did when we were kids, and as the sun was rising, he went to sleep, Kelly had fallen asleep and I was so hyper excited about the nights events and the forthcoming Convention, that I got not 1 wink of sleep.

The Corina Connection and Glamour Con Convention

AZ and photgrapher Karlton with Corina, Alex DeMonaco and friend

The weeks prior to Glamour Con 36 Chicago there was a good bit of press regarding Corina joining me in attending Glamour Con. This was reported far and wide on all of the Adult Industry Insider websites. So there wa a lot of hype surrounding our initial meeting. This also resulted in opening teh eyes of many studios and their kin. I had calls coming in from Hollywood wanting to work with the two of us in every capacity. This was going to be more than a leisurely meeting, it had turned into a major project. One that would require a lot more time and energy than I had prepared myself for. But one that would generate a friendship built on admiration and mutual respect.

Corina and Justine Jolie

So next thing I know, it's 10 AM, Kelly is up and off to work and my brother and I are cleaning up and packing everything to go to our ultimate destination, Glamour Con at the O'Hare Crown Plaza Hotel. And at 10:45 we carry all of our things to the bus stop take it to the Blue Line and at noon I am checking into my room on the 5h floor. I had purchased a bottle of Cabo Wabo Blanco as a token of this special occasion along with some mighty fine cigars. And after I change into my leather I have a shot on ice and head downstairs to pick up our press passes for the 2 day event. And who is the VERY FIRST person I see? Michael Illinsky aka Steve Svetty and he was in rare form. We caught up to speed and walked around greeting some of the girls and I was scouting for Corina, who I knew would stick out easily. But first I had to stop by Martins table. Martin was sent by Cherry Boxx picture and my friend and associate Dominick who I've become associated with through AVN and the Adult Entertainment Industry. Martin was with Kira Reed and we shook hands and made plans for the days shoots with his girls and mine. I stopped by to see Taylor Wayne, the Brit beauty who was having her birthday party at the After Dark party again later that night. Taylor was anxious to tell me how she had spent the previous evening in Las Vegas with Gene Simons at his birthday where they were filming for his new reality show and Celebrity Poker. I tried nicely to pass that off and tell her how great it was to see her and praying that Genes name would not come up again. And for anyone that knew me from the ages of 12 years old to 25 years old associates Gene and KISS with me, but I've lost faith in him as an idol and role model by now. To me he has gone beyond a business man, but is as or if not more self righteous, arrogant and misogynistic as anyone I've ever met. And I will never get out of my mind how he treated Carly last Jan at AVN in Vegas or his attitude towards anyone male.

Taylor Wayne to the left of Gene on the KISSman's Birthday in Vega$

It was during a walk through thecenter of the room, over polluted with fans my brother had now dubbed CHUDS, Cannibalistic Humanoid Underground Dwellers, because he had the theory they only come out for events like this. And that was when I spotted Corina across the room and I could tell she had immediately recognized me. I mean in the grand scheme, there aren't many others like myself attending these events. I met her friend and photographer Joe Louis and I took them over to Martins table, made plans for a shoot and we all met up in the dining area in the lobby. This is when things started getting funny and I was ready for a drink, seriously ready.

My brother and I were alone eating ridiculously over priced deli sandwiches and a fan boy comes over to us and asks if we're rocks stars. Just like that, he walks over, and looks at us, and inquirers, "Are you rock stars?". and we kind of laughed and then he asked if we were porn stars, and again we replied with a laugh and no. And as he kept trying to converse with us and Svetty joined us, there were a couple wise cracks as he began talking about KISS and then when Corina and Joe joined us he must have been convinced that were we someone he believed we were. And he FINALLY left. Micheal sat there and kept making all laugh as he and I traded stories about our recent love interests. I mean a year ago you'd never had picked a couple Playboys like us out to settle down, but we both found something in the last year. And to sit there face to face as two men boasting their newfound feelings for our current mates isn't something that normally happens in midst's of a sea of sex.

And this is where I need to interject my loyal reader is that Kelly would be joining me, only later in the early evening. And she will be joining me at AVN next Jan. This is a big deal because finally after all of these years she is someone comfortable and secure enough with our relationship that she isn't intimidated by me having so many female friends who are porn stars and centerfolds. And that is important, very important for the stability of this relationship no matter how long it lasts. And for me that's like finding the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. And she's not intimidated by the fact that part of my job is reviewing the movies and spending quality tie with these women. Kelly is a rarity in a world like mine, and I don't know why it took me so long to notice her. Yeah, I do, I wasn't ready. Not ready at all at that time. It took till May and it hit me across the face like a slap to wake me up.

We ate and went back up to the room where I made my first cocktail of the day and went back downstairs to make my rounds. I found Karlton and then met his new model the sex symbol Alex DeMonaco. And then I found the lovely Natalie Lynn and this was the first time I saw her new boobs. Not like she ever needed them before, but it's her body and her life and it's her choice to do so. She looks great and owns a great personality anyway. Michael and I got a lot of photos with various models and made some new connections and had a ball doing so. I made time to chat with Seka who after all these years has moved to Kansas City from Chicago. It's hard to believe that it's been 6 years since we met, had drinks and I walked her up to her condo in Olde Towne. And it was nice that she remembered me. I mean we can't forget Seka but this class act meets thousands of guys. Maybe I left an impression. She did call me a year ago last May in regards to her newly acquired website from the people who had stolen her domain years before. Seka Seka Seka, the last broad. And a fine broad indeed.

When the bar opened at 430 we went in said Hello to Luis and the rest of the staff and Newbomb had showed up and Greg Miner was here and the lot of us were sitting around and Svetty ordered a bunch of munchies and himself an order of shrimp cocktail, something he would later regret. We made another round in teh Con Center and retreated to our rooms. All total my gang had 5 rooms. A few of us hung out i my suite and made drnks and talked of some of Grego's and mines misadventures. There was laughter all around. Joel showed up and Svetty joined us and we all sat and waited for Kelly to arrive who aught a ride with Brian and Sherrie. It was Sherries birthday as well and I had a cake waiting upstairs that I lugged with me in a cooler as well as the rest of my baggage. Where's my midget when I most needed him? Oh, he was downstairs. That fucking guy. And shortly after 9 Kelly arrived and began to get ready and we all convened on the After Dark party where my work was really about to begin. I mean it was this time of the day that was teh time I needed to wind down, kick up my heels, and have some fun. This was when Glamour Con turned into Kinder Care and I was the guardian.

Michael and I walked back into the VIP area where Taylor was celebrating her birthday with a host of other beauties and we did some photos and then I grabbed Sherrie and got a birthday photo of her and Taylor and some other babes. Corina finally arrived after a rather long, but typical photo shoot with Karlton. K-Rawk is a perfectionist and his work shows that. And then Mike Gierek showed up and things were getting very busy, I lost Svetty and then in walked Seka. Seka doesn't really do photos but for me was more than willing to pose with Corina. The first southern belle in porn meets the latest southern belle in porn. This was indeed a MILESTONE. Then I was pulled away by Martin and asked to gather up all of my girls and no guys for a totally explicit shot in Kira's suite. I saw my brother on the way and offered for him to join Kelly and I at the shoot. A few shots were done of Corina and then Sherrie got in the act, and being she is a natural exhibinonist as a dominatrix, had no problem doing the shoot 'her way' and it was tasteful and fun. We sat there in some chairs like observers and partook in the free booze that was being offered by Kira's folks. After it wrapped I decided that I had a host of guests I had left downstairs unannounced and we all went back to the party. A few of the fellows were a little pissed that they weren't invited to view the shoot, and they weren't. It wasn't my thing and I was given strict instructions that it was to be myself and a load of women. I snuck my brother in by telling them who he was. later I took Grego up or a shoot and we watched something a little more explicit than what Kelly and my brother has witnessed with me and afterwards the ladies posed nude with us.

I grabbed Kelly and we finished decorating Sherries cake and took it down to her. Everyone sang and as I did a few more pix w/ Corina I turned to find that Sherrie, Brian and the cake were gone. I was at a loss for words. We went up to their room to check in and it seemed there was a bit of a misunderstanding and Brian handed us a bottle of Kettle One and we went back to drop it off at the room. Downstairs the party was wrapping and I decided to take the party up to my suite. Besides we had tons of booze.

Welcome To Kinder Kare

In front of my eyes I saw people, these people, my friends drifting into deep intoxication. and it was about 2 AM and I still had not slept in almost 48 hours. I ended up taking care of everyone. Which basically meant, still no fun for me. I mean in teh long haul I was having a good time but I had a long work week, and have not had a chance to wind down since logging off two days ago downtown. Joel had two older ladies with him who had worked with Hugh Hefner for many years here at Playboy Chicago and I suspect they were recently retired. And one of them was really giving me a hard time so I excused Joel and the ladies and later Joel came back without them. That's a true friend. I don't appreciate being treated like that in my suite after I offered them my generosity and hospitality. I actually saw her the next day and she was very distant.

Around 330 AM Greg finally left an everyone but Joel had finally retired. However I was wide awake and just wanted to chill and talk with a bud. Joel was in no condition and actually was so out of it he was speaking in his native Sioux tongue. It was getting weird. Finally my phone rag. It was Sherrie and Brian at 530 AM I went to their room w/ Joel and spent a few hours talking. Finally around 7AM I was able to fall asleep only after I let Joel go. He wasn't driving and though he was more than welcome to stay and I tried to get him to, I was in no shape to argue and sent him on his way and curled up next to Kelly.

I was up at 930. Kelly was hungry and we ordered room service. My brother went downstairs and reserved a room for him to stay in that night before heading home and after we all ate, we said our farewells and he was off and I got everyone else who had survived together and we finished teh day at the show. Kelly and Sherrie bought corsets and shoes and Kelly even bough some clear heels. I can just see them flying across the dancefloor now. Brian and I walked around and did some photos and Kelly was hanging out with Kira Reed who was being ultra sweet to her. Corina and Joe were long gone and Svetty was nowhere to be found. Finally it came to 5PM and we could go home. Brian and Sherrie dropped us off and I was asleep by 730. Out cold by 730PM Sunday and didn't wake up till almost 6 AM Monday morning to get ready for work.

Getting ready was about all I could do. My voice was gone and I was feeling very ill. I thought maybe it was exhaustion but I had no voice to use for work. So I had no choice but to call in. Little did I know two other people were also out and one of teh guys who works in an office across from me, whose project I was working on before he missed two days to being sick, must have passed it around. I'm sure sleep depravation didn't help, but it was evident it was the bug going around at work.

I spent all day laying down falling in and out of sleep watching digital cable. I couldn't write, email, or even speak to anyone. And when I went back to work on Tuesday I didn't think I'd make it through the day.

Looking back if I had one regret from everything that I had put into the previous weekend, I have to say it was that I didn't have the time nor an opportunity to share my Cabo Wabo with anyone, a higher priced and finest of all tequilas, and the money I spent on cigars, went wasted being that not one of them were lit up. And for me to want to inhale anything that burns, is a rarity.

The week was virtually uneventful.

RED LINE BLUES

And suddenly Thursday afternoon I got a wild hare up my ass and called Kelly at work and inquired if she'd like to go bowling. The response was one of sheer excitement. And I entertained the thought for a moment to gather a feast of fiends. But I opted against. A night w/ my girl alone, in a place where nobody would recognize us, a place where we didn't matter, and a place where no matter how bad we sucked at bowling we were definitely going to have thee royal BLAST. And there would only be one thing that could ruin that royal of all greats blasts. THE FUCKING RED LINE!

By some amazing act of the gods my gal actually got off of work the same time as me. We met at the Chicago Ave stop on teh Red Line. It was crowded, of course, it was rush hour. Kelly found a seat, I stood behind her leaving, as I always do, any open seat available for a lady/woman/female/girl. I began talking to my lady as I stand behind her as a woman who was sitting on the outside of a 2 seat row asked Kelly if she wanted to switch so we may sit together, NOW THAT WAS NICE. That was very considerate and we sat together and maybe it was a premonition on her part or a long over due token of Karma, a belief I've long given up on. A few minutes later we were STUCK. for 45 mofo $%#@*&!%#!#!#! minutes! Because another PRICK set the tracks of the Red Line fire and we were, for lack of a better metaphor, FUCKED!

I am so obsessed in my disgruntle over the Red Line it rivals my supreme displeasure of the littering of Cheetos bags in our fair city. This summer I've seen fools throw themselves onto the tracks, I've even on a train when someone would somehow jump out of the moving carriage thus resulting in being hung up on this cities wonderful rapid transit. I have witnessed dumbfucks playing unfunny pranks by leaving unattended baggage on a train after the bombings in London. Cheap fucking worthless thrills. What a pathetic life one must lead to get their jollies by stalling everyone's workday and getting a little spark by creating terror . Maybe it's a little power trip you fucking pricks, but it affects the hardworking taxpaying Americans that get you through the week by supporting your weak asses. Beside, you are all in DIRE NEED OF A BLOWJOB. And money can't even buy that for you jerks because you can't exist in the real world CHUD!

So after 45 minutes we moved along and made a hasty exit at Belmont because Kelly had to pee and I suggested Leona's so we could grab a bite to eat.

For the record, I had the most incredible Veggie burger. But needless to say we never made it to the bowling alley thanks to the Red Line Blues.

Lots of work and rest and nothing on the clock till we went to eat Saturday night at an Argentinean restaurant on Sheffield with John (Full Throttle of I LOVE RICH) and his fiancé Sheri. It was a good time though very crowded and we even wrapped it up at the new Dairy Queen.

Last Weekend Of Summer

Then Sunday I got food poisoning, I was covered in a rash and the smell of meat made me want to YAK, and hurl, puke, and vomit I did a lot of. Sunday I was a token invalid. Maybe it would have been different if Newbomb really meant that he wanted me to come out to Tubby's drive Inn, but it wasn't. To his credit he left his cell phone at home, went elsewhere and completely forgot I had planned to take the train ALL THE WAY out to Naperville to rock with him. Oh well, better to be sick at home then sick in Naperville.

But it was the one year anniversary since we were at Tubby's and watched "The Warriors" and Dee Snider at "All Rods Lead to Sturgis" and a rather upsetting phone call that ruined that weekend. The next time I was to go to Tubby's my mother passed away.