I never set out to start a business or corporation. When I conceived the idea of MK back in 1994 I wanted to provide a service to the demographic of people who share the common love for the entertainment that we do. That we absorb ourselves in, and separates us, from them.
They dubbed us a Goth read. Why? I guess at the time there was a lot of really good gothic industrial music on the scene. I don't think it's ever been as significant and successful as it was from 94-97.
A lot has changed since then. About music, me, and I hope MK became better. I hope. And from what I've been told it has.
At the time I created AZ, the person you al know and the person I now am. I created a character and became him. Partly because he was always in me, ad partly as a defense mechanism. Along the way I buried the person I was before. An insecure womanizer. Yes, I do miss him sometimes, but I don't miss what came with him. It was if anything a symbolic suicide.
By my own admission I had no idea what I was doing at the time, but I learned a lot in the last 10 years. In a lot of ways I still don't know what I'm doing. Like I said, I never started this thing to make a living. I simply wanted to provide a service. It was one persons selfishness that forced me to become a businessman. Story of my life.
And speaking of stories, most of you know the reason I started MK ULTRA was because I conducted a wonderful interview with our beloved Peter Steele and a particular got zine I freelanced for insisted Type O were a mockery of Goth. I've found over the years that although TON are a tongue in cheek group pf artists, that the Gothic audience has embraced them and are not threatened by the bands testosterone. If fact if anything the vain gothic people are flattered by Type O's sonic therapy. (thanks pete)
So here we/I am 10 years later. I've succeeded more in making friends within the industry than I have a businessman, and for me that's okay. I like these people, a lot. We are tight, we are loyal and we are capable of having a pretty good goddamned time. And though many people see that as a bad thing, I do not. I enjoy drinking and I love girls and you get that and more in the entertainment industry. And I get to see a side of the reality that nobody gets at a meet and greet. And when they come to town who do they call? And contrary to what some people have heard, I do not sell cocaine to rock bands. I would be a rich man if I knew enough about the drug trade to be a dealer. I do sometimes get them girls. In the end, I write stories about them, and I share good times with them. Other than that, I am the luckiest fan in history.
At the same time I have not been as lucky in love. And for someone who fancies himself a bit of a romantic, that is the real downside. I've lost girls to rock stars, I've lost girls because they cannot handle themselves in the company of celebs, and I've lost girls because they cannot handle some of the things such as free alcohol that come with situations. For instance when waiting to meet some one like Alice Cooper who has been sober for a good many years now, you don't get so intoxicated and obnoxious that the tour managers insists that "you get that drunk chick away from here, you're not taking her backstage." There is indeed a breaking point and when dealing with a legend the likes of Alice, good behavior or at least decent behavior is in order. And it's respectful at the least. Now imagine me and having to deal with someone who had to deal with this level of disappointment and rejection. When it's a pretty little thing who is totally self absorbed with herself it's not a very enjoyable encore.
Sometimes it really sucks being AZ.
MK has always embraced anything that had to do with the adult entertainment industry and last year I mad the decision to take it on as part of what we write about. Many ex's in my past were intimidated by me having anything to do with "porn stars". And I finally said fuck it and went balls out. I was taken in by AVN and the rest of the industry in a way the music biz never did.
This is not to say that I haven't been embraced by a large part of the music business. But in the reality of things the music business is not as healthy as it was a decade ago or prior. Remember the good ol' days. I mean MK and myself have been lucky enough to be mentioned in many advertisements, in the inside of cds, on TV, the radio, and by record labels. For fucks sake we had out name on two pigface tours as sponsor because of what we deliver. And I've been asked to speak at Colleges, and High Schools about my involvement in the industry, it's influences and have dispelled many of it's rumors etc. Remember for some reason I've been accepted as insider.
I'm not stroking myself people, I'm only stating the facts.
And then there are the envious, and you do not want these people twisting the facts kiddies, but they do, because they are so entirely unhappy with themselves they cannot live with the fact that those of us who struggle to create something that people admire, can actually, at times, have a good time and reap a few rewards of our hard work and tireless devotion to something we love as much as music. When you're us you find out that they say things like this
*One of the main reasons Alex's magazine swtiched from
music to porn is because he burned so many bridges in
the music industry and has no idea how to run a
business. So he had to tap new resources where he
knew there would be money and they weren't hip to his
lack of business ethics
I'm the king of typos, but use spell check when you spew such venom.
Accusations like this do two things. People who know better laugh it off, and people who do not know better spread the lies like a dirty slut does herpes. And it gets around and gets worse with time because those on the outside who do not know and have no clue how it really works. And it's true, I'm not really a businessman. To devote oneself to the demographic that I do requires love and dedication. Ratings and popularity do not pay the bills, selling out does. And I refuse.
As far as the part about the disrespect of the music industry, well I think my record and kudos speak for itself. So I won't even try to defend myself on this issue. So, enjoy the show.
I like being on the inside of the porn industry. There are many things that people tend to believe about the people who work in the business that is complete bullshit and that I know the truth about which is totally ridiculous.What's so bad about hanging out with porn stars like Jenna Jameson, Jesse Jane, and even Ron Jeremy? Don't you wish you could? if you don't I have no clue why you even come to my website. When Gauge was here where do you think she went for a good time? Who took her? I had a great time as did everyone else.
I had a great time hanging out with, having lunch and dinner with, and partying with Seymore Butts, Mari Possa and company. Who wouldn't. I get to be on his Showtime reality show because of my liaison with the industry. I also learned a lot more and I love with great passion gaining knowledge from personal experience.
So why porn? It's because I know about it as I know as much as I do about rock n roll which comes from 30 years of being the ultimate fan. My father had a stack of Hustlers, Penthouse and Playboy that would rival that of any hardcore sofa jockey. That's what I call a chronic masturbator. And no, my old man wasn't, he's an infamous womanizer. I'm sure his collection inspired him. It certainly inspired me.
And working in a video store with free rentals, of course you occasionally take porn home. You neighbor rents it, and so does your family and co-worker. Don't let them lie to you, I rented to them. And when working inside sales at the cable industry you really get a look at what people are watching on pay per view.
So why porn? It's as American as baseball, hot dogs, apple pie and Chevrolet. And besides, the people in the adult industry are more fun to hang out with and work with than most anyone I can think of. Plus the woman are freaking HOT! So if I want to make a few more bucks by association myself with the industry, I don't see anything wrong with it. MK and AZ have earned more publicity, respect and exposure in the last year that in 9 years before that. And PR doesn't come cheap, and for me at least in this respect in comes free.
I may not be Donald Trump when it comes to running a business, but I have been told I'm the ultimate publicist and promoter. I only happen to not deal with top 40 horseshit. So, I'm not wealthy. But at least I have my self respect. So being AZ is not always an easy job, but it does have it's benefits.
I've been doing this for 10 years, I've been an industry insider in one way or another be it radio, clubs, theatre, sales, or a freelance for most of my life. It's what I'm good at, so why should I do anything else.
I'll see you from the VIP seats, and then at the party. If your invited. I know whoever wrote that BS about me isn't.
I have the best friends in earth and I don't have to buy them or fuck them. So sometimes though it isn't easy being AZ, it's at times, pretty fucking cool.
Now if you would excuse me I have a very successful rock band to hang out with, and it's time to go.
Alex Zander 10/2004Posted by Alex Zander at November 22, 2004 02:09 PM